I felt you..

I always searched for you but never got you. I used to look for you in every single moment, single thing of my life but all in vain as I always got disappointed. Time passed, I went through many changes but nothing worked out. Then, I became sad. Sadness became an all time companion of me. Where ever I go, sadness followed me. Then I found you in some people, I made them my life, my mood swings started depending on them.

But, as soon as they realized it, they felt relaxed because they got a loyal toy to play, within me. With time I found it the most foolish thing anybody can do. But it was not in my hand, as my heart found happiness in others and not in me, so he chose them over me. I kept on remaining low day by day. Finally one day, I broke down and oh stupid I, as i took their shoulders only to lean on, to lighten me. They again won as it became clear to them that I will always be their puppet.  

With time, I started keeping myself busy, so that I don’t get even a single second to think about my heart, my emotions, my expectations. It was then that I stopped looking for happiness in anything. I started bending towards spirituality. I devoted myself to my God, his activities, meditation.

And now what, I started feeling something nice when I see people so much dedicated towards their goals, caring for their loved ones, a mother with her little daughter in the temple folding hands to bless them in front of God, I felt satisfaction in God’s world, in the words written for him.

It is the time, when I have sidelined my idea of looking for happiness in the fulfillment of my expectations, in fact I have found it (happiness) just there, where I get to see truth, true love between love birds, adorable creatures named dogs, a loving mother, caring father, supportive siblings, and everything in which I see God’s message of his presence.

So, now I can say ‘I FELT YOU’ happiness, I felt you just when I saw you in others.